Monday, 10 October 2011

Managing Stress Through Helpful Questions

When you find yourself on the 'tipping point' of becoming stressed with all the dreadful feelings and behaviour that usually ensue STOP and take a deep breath.

Now, ask yourself the following questions (they work for me and I truly was a big stress-head!):
  1. What am I reacting to?
  2. What is it that I think is going to happen here?
  3. Is this fact?
  4. What's the worst (and best) that could happen? What's most likely to happen?
  5. What would I like to happen - my outcome?
  6. How helpful is it for me to think this way?
  7. Am I getting things out of proportion? 
  8. Is it worth it?
  9. How important is this really? How important will it be in a month's time? 
  10. What meaning am I giving this situation?
  11. Can I see that this meaning is inflexible?
  12. Am I overestimating the threat?
  13. Am I underestimating my ability to cope?
  14. Have I got my ‘stress-head’ on?
  15. What do I look like to other people? How am I affecting them?
  16. Am I mind-reading what others might be thinking?
  17. Am I believing I can predict the future?
  18. Is there another way of looking at this?
  19. What advice would I give someone else in this situation?
  20. Am I putting more pressure on myself?
  21. Just because I feel bad, doesn't mean things really are bad.
  22. Can I do things any differently here?
  23. How much can I control in this situation? What is outside of my control?
  24. What changes (however small) can I make to those things that I am able to control?
  25. What do I want or need from this person or situation? What do they want or need from me?  Is there a compromise?
  26. What would be the consequences of responding the way I usually do?
  27. Is there another way of dealing with this? 
  28. What would be the most helpful and effective action to take? (for me, for the situation, for the other person)
  29. What could I gain/lose?
  30. What will I do?
If this blog has been helpful then please do leave a comment. If you, a friend or relative would like support in managing your stress or anxiety please get in touch via our website West of England Coaching and Counselling.

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