Addressing Your Angst

Do you suffer from anxiety and fear of failure?

This blog aims to provide you with ways to cope better with the anxiety and fears that occupy your mind and impact the whole of your life.

A period of honest reflection helps.

I suggest that you ask yourself the following seven questions

1. What am I afraid of? 
2. Why am I afraid of this?
3. Is this true? what evidence do I have for this fear/worry?
4. What is this belief doing to me?
5. Who would I be if I did not have this belief?
6. What is the opposite of this experience?
7. What would I like to believe instead that would be helpful to me?

You may not have all of the answers on first sitting but if you continue to reflect on these questions and others that you can think of you will come up with more positive alternatives and this will lead to your having more self confidence and enhance your self-esteem. 

Even something simple like moving from 'I cannot do x' to 'I can do x if I choose to by coming up with a new approach' will lead you to better choices, a more optimistic outlook and better results if you are hungry enough. I mean that if your intent is 100% and your attitude is positive then your will move forwards.

You could also ask yourself what you would notice [and others] if you let go of your fear/angst. What would you feel then?

Many people use meditation to address their anxiety and worries so you could sit in a calm place for say ten minutes a day focusing on your breathing and feeling the emotions that surface. This process will help you to know that your anxieties will not overwhelm you and that you can survive them simply by breathing.

Activities may also help you to address your anxiety such as meeting new people through a club of interest and of course exercise that releases feel-good hormones into your system that combat anxiety and leave you feeling more in control.

If you are resisting change or would for other reasons like help in addressing your anxieties please get in touch via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk and please leave a comment if you have used and enjoyed the changes in thinking stimulated by this blog.

Eating differently in 2013

Many of us start the new year with a goal to lose weight and get fit. If this is relevant to you now then some of the tips in this blog may be useful.

If you are eating too much it's often for emotional reasons including feeling bad, feeling good or just plain bored.

To stop the old cycle and habits you need to find a better way to manage your emotions.

Step one is to recognise that emotional hunger is different from real hunger and comes on quite suddenly. Ask yourself what am I feeling right now? Name the emotions.

Step two is to to mentally press the pause button to slow down the often quick unconscious action of eating when you are not truly hungry. Pause for sixty seconds and ask yourself some questions such as 'how will I feel when I have eaten this?' It helps to record your feelings and question answers initially to increase your awareness about specifically what is happening for you.

Step three is to examine your beliefs about food - for example, do you feel anxious around food because of the conflicting information out there about what you should and should not eat?

Be curious in finding out your own truth and trust your body. For example if you have heard that it's good to start the day with porridge, fruit and nuts, try it for a week - do you notice any difference in your energy levels in the morning? If it works for your lifestyle you may want to continue with this change.

We often start the new year with a high intention of some radical diet and find it lasts a week or less.

I think that you are better off taking small steps and changing one thing at a time. And try not to suffer! For example if chocolate is your thing still eat it but go for the high cocoa dark chocolate which is richer with small amounts being more filling.

Nothing is forbidden but aim to eat mindfully - focusing on eating sat down at a table rather than watching TV or reading for example.

If you have found this blog to be useful please leave a comment.

If you would like support in achieving your personal and professional goals in 2013 please get in touch via our website www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk where you can also sign up for a complimentary 'better work results today' coaching session.

Emotionally Intelligent Leadership

This blog highlights the importance of emotional intelligence [EI] within your leadership styles.

If effective relationships are key to business success then emotional intelligence is key to effective relationships.

Strong leaders are assertive, with self-awareness, self-empathy and self-control as well as others aware able to detect and respond to the emotions of others. This is the essence of what emotional intelligence is about.

EI is developed through coaching to become a better leader, a more versatile leader and to develop a high performing team.

EI gives you awareness of your leadership style and helps you to develop new leadership styles.

EI helps you to get the best from your people and helps you to be more successful, achieving better outcomes.

EI helps you to motivate and inspire your people through the toughest changes and challenges.

In business as in sport strong performance and results is largely down to leadership.

If you are serious about becoming a better leader then getting to grips with your emotional intelligence is key.

If this blog has given you a useful steer then please leave a comment.

For help and support in developing your emotional intelligence please get in touch via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk

Public Speaking - Fear to Confidence

If you are about to take on a role that will involve more public speaking or you have ongoing issues in this area, you are not alone.

Public speaking is growing and yet it is the work area that we fear the most.

This blog aims to help you to improve how you feel when preparing for and in delivery of your presentation.

The imagination is the rehearsal room for reality.

With this in mind, start by familiarising yourself with where you will be speaking.

See yourself in this environment standing in front of the audience and looking confident. For you this might be standing tall whilst tightening your solar plexus and with a slight smile. Experiment with different looks and how they make you feel in rehearsal.

Next picture yourself gaining eye contact with some of your audience as you deliver your introduction. Look one person in the eye and move on to the next. The awkward feeling of being watched stops when you are watching back.

Now picture individuals in the audience smiling and nodding in an encouraging way remembering all the time that they want you to be interesting, engaging and stimulating.

See yourself being yourself being authentic which will help you to gain your audience's trust quickly.

Whilst you are rehearsing and visualising you may notice that your heart beats faster, you may sweat or shake which means that adrenalin is being produced.

A way of fighting high adrenalin is movement so taking a brisk walk, clenching and unclenching your fists and stretching your facial muscles will help.

I think that some nerves are good - for your energy and the fact that you care which will come across.

Let me know how you get on by leaving a comment.

For all of your business and life coaching support needs please contact us via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk