Overcoming Fear

 A client wanted to address her fear of presenting

Despite preparing the presentation content thoroughly, she knew that she would have nerves, culminating in a panic attack, shortly before she was due to present and would make an excuse. Someone else would step in and she would feel relieved.

Our physiological experience belies what is going on in our mind. The thoughts she was having were negative and causing her anxious physical symptoms: she told herself that she would colour up, forget her words and that people would think she was weak.

Imagine yourself about to descend down a mountain on your skis. Are you anxious or excited? Physiologically these feelings are the same. How we present the feelings to ourselves determines whether it manifests as excitement, or fear.

We discussed this analogy and my client was able to say:

“So if I can get excited about it, I will experience the same feelings, but it will be ok?”

We had a conversation about an example topic and what could be exciting about the content or the way she presented it.

I have just received a call from her to say that she had presented to a small group, as a trial of her new approach and it went well.

Same feelings, different thoughts.

Choose your thoughts carefully.

Big love,

Pam

Outcome focused Coaching

The desired outcome is a great way to focus the approach we take

One of yesterday’s clients was an initial consultation. They said that the takeaway was thinking more specifically about their outcome.

My coaching starts with a complimentary consultation to check for rapport, to discuss target outcomes, approach and to outline the budget. Some clients self-fund, wanting to control the agenda entirely; others are organisation funded.

My approach thereon is tailored to desired outcomes. It combines solution-focused coaching, advising, mentoring and counselling. With over 30 years in business and people development, I can help you to develop the behaviours and strategies that you need to achieve your outcomes.

Keep moving forwards!

Pam.

Are you Fulfilled?

What is your Purpose?

Where do you fit in?

Do you feel like a square peg in a round hole?

Do you feel a void inside because you know deep down that you are in the wrong place?

Or maybe you feel like it is the right place but wrong approach?

You feel tension as you have more questions than answers. Do you want better but do not know what that is and how to articulate it; it is a feeling.

You want to have a clear identity and purpose but do not know how to achieve these.

You want to be happier personally and professionally but feel stuck.

I worked with a client who presented herself in this way at our first meeting. We focused on a coaching exercise that helped her to pinpoint precisely what she did want.

Gradually she formulated her purpose and identity based on what she wanted. We used her values, skills and preferred behaviours as part of this process of logical levels. We also had conversations about ideas on how to get there, with manageable small steps that she took weekly. By addressing her problems, we helped to simplify her life, and her business.

People are fascinating!

Big Love,

Pam.

Disagreeing At Work

If you want to communicate better in a challenging situation this blog is for you.

I saw a client today who wanted to debate cleanly.

She said that whilst she remains calm while she tells a colleague what she thinks, they become angry and the relationship is suffering.

We initially had a conversation about what she could do differently and as she was struggling to find a strategy that she was happy with, I asked if she would like to practice a suggestion from me.

I suggested that the next time she wanted to have a conversation with her colleague about something she could begin with "what do you think about x? Listen hard and ask probing questions to understand their full thoughts. Then to ask clarification questions to check understanding before saying that she understood. 

We spoke about it being easy at this point if she agreed with her colleague. But what if she disagreed?

I suggested that she say "I understand and can see where you are coming from. I actually think y, because of a, b and c (rationale).

We explored understanding vs agreeing. We also explored how understanding another's perspective before sharing what you think allowed you to consider that first and perhaps even agree with aspects before being understood yourself, hopefully!

I will let you know how she got in a month's time when I am seeing her next.

For help, support and guidance with your personal and professional challenges please contact me via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.

Big Love

Pam

Not satisfied in your Work Life?

 Not satisfied in your work life?

For years in my career I thought that the reason for my dissatisfaction was the job. 

I came to realise  later that the reason was me.

Looking back at my career prior to working as a professional and personal coach, counsellor and mentor, I was not being me. Feedback told me that I was very hard working and achieved very good results. However, this did not cut it for me and I was not happy in my work overall.

Are you able to distinguish between what you are very good at and what you really enjoy? It took me years to make the distinction. I grew up in my career with the belief to play to my strengths embedded by teachers, parents and line managers.

I would like to suggest that you spend a few minutes today answering this question for you. 

How would you feel if you were enjoying about 70% of your work life, an achievable goal I think?

A starting point could be which skills do I enjoy using in my existing role? What can I do to increase the amount of time applying these skills? For example, if you enjoy planning and organising, could you spend the first 30 minutes of your workday revising your to do list for the next week? This fits with the concept that baby steps in the right direction can increase your level of satisfaction incrementally. For example, by 1 point up a scale from 1-10.

Try it and let me know how you go.

If you would benefit from help and support with your needs and wants do get in touch via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk.

Big Love, Pam 

Professional Coaching?

 If you would like to do better in your professional or work life please read on.

You are spending a significant amount of your waking life at work but you are somewhat discontented. 

Perhaps you have been overlooked for promotion, are at odds with your boss/line manager or have been thinking about changing jobs/careers for some time. Perhaps your business is in financial trouble.

You may have been procrastinating about making changes.

You are not alone. Human beings resist change as we prefer the status quo even when it's bad. Empirical research has shown that it takes a lot of courage to make significant change such as leaving a spouse or job/career.

With this in mind it makes the role of an independent helpful and supportive professional who will be your confidante and conscience, an important one.

My clients like that I follow up their action plans with them and help them to overcome barriers and obstacles such as lack of confidence and motivation.

Whatever your situation, let's have an initial conversation to discuss your needs and wants. We can then agree a programme that works for you in terms of budget and content. If you are local great, a face to face approach is good. If you are not a Microsoft teams approach also works well.

Get in touch now via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk or e mail enquiries@westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk

Big love, Pam

Personal and Professional Coaching, Counselling and Mentoring

If there are things that you would like to change or improve that you know would benefit your personal and work results please read on.

At West of England Coaching and Counselling, I provide a one stop shop for your personal improvement.

We will discuss your existing strengths and how to use your resources to address your development needs, from your work self-assessment and also from feedback from key people in your life.

We will focus on your continuous personal growth so that you are always working towards your best self. This will help you to feel more content. Why? Because we are by nature goal focused. Without a goal we become bored and start to ask, what's the point? I will help you to focus on actions to drive the changes that you want. I will also be your conscience and hold you accountable each session for the actions that you set last time.

I will help you with your personal analysis so that you raise your awareness of what is working and what needs your attention, by priority.

I will help you to develop your positive attitude and to consider consequences before taking actions.

I will help you with your creative and innovative thinking through faster, easier, cheaper ways of getting things done.

I will help you to develop the gravitas that you need as a leader to achieve results through others.

Please get in touch with me via www.westofenglandcoachingandcounselling.co.uk.

Big love, Pam